Monday, May 17, 2010

You Can Kiss My Ascot

Now I don't want to get off on a rant here, but who the hell wears an ascot into Summers?

Having just read Rene Descartes' "Discourse on Method" I now know my first question should have been who the hell actually wears an ascot out in public?

I hate to rush to judgement because I like to consider myself an open-minded and flexible person. Maybe he likes to wear an ascot. Maybe he's from England. Maybe he's the world's worst tie tier and he just sort of bunched it up and shoved it down the front of his button-down Oxford.

Open-mindedness aside, Summers is no place for ascots. Hell, I feel like a Narc every time I walk into Summers wearing a tie. Honestly, I feel like a Narc when I'm wearing pants in Summers. Summers isn't a very welcoming place.

I certainly don't welcome someone wearing an ascot.

I also don't welcome someone that tells the bartender how to make a drink and then gets into an argument about how a slice of lemon is different from a twist of lemon. I don't care if you're a professor or a Doctor of Drink Garnishments, that kind of talk has no place in Summers.

Summers is for the people.

And if you ask me why I know what an ascot is, I'll kick your ascot.

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