The Grinch Who Stole Customers

Every Drinker
Down in Drinker-ville
Liked Happy Hour a lot...

But Joe,
Who lived just North of Who-ville,
Did NOT!

Joe hated Happy hour! The whole happy hour equation!
Now, please don't ask why. No one quite knows the reason.
It could be that his head wasn't screwed on quite right.
It could be, perhaps, that his shoes were too tight.
But I think that the most likely reason of all
May have been that his heart was two sizes too small.

Or it could have been that he was getting nervous
Because his deplorable level of customer service
That was making customers insane
While they waited in vain
And it was never quite clear
When they would get they're next beer

But, Whatever the reason, His heart or his turn signal blinkers,
He stood there on Happy hour Eve, hating the inebriated drinkers,
Staring down from his cave with a sour, Grinchy frown
At the warm lighted windows below in their town.
For he knew every Drinker down in Drinker-ville beneath
Was busy now, hanging a mistleoe wreath.

"And they're hanging their empty beers!" he snarled with a sneer.
"Tomorrow will have another happy hour! It's practically here!"
Then he growled, with his grinch fingers nervously drumming,
"I MUST find a way to keep Happy Hour from coming!"
For, tomorrow, he knew...