Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Are You Ready for Some Foosball?

Football. I meant football. Are you ready for some football?

Jayzus. I'd love to blame the idjit that invented the qwerty keyboard that put the s so close to the t (and that's not a euphemism for the wind that shakes the barley (which is a euphemism for putting the biscuit in the basket (which is a euphemism for plowing the fields (which is a euphemism for doing it (which is a euphemism for good craic))))) but I have nobody but myself and my inability to not type and post when I'm three sheets to the wind (which is a euphemism for being shitfaced (which is not a euphemism for taking a #2 (which is a euphemism for taking a dump (which is not a euphemism for going to visit the local recycling center) but which is not a euphemism for offering chocolate brownies to the porcelain god))).

The whole point being that the NFL season starts this Thursday and Summers should have the football game on television, provided you call ahead (no), be very specific, promise to spend a lot of money, know someone that acutally works at the bar (and if you know someone that work a the bar can you ask them to get me another drink (which is not a euphemism for yanking (which is not a euphemism for the New York Yankees) my chain(which is a euphemism for my chain (which is a euphemisn for my pecker (yes))))), follow up with that person by asking them directly and in person and then by sending them a facebook status update because they check their phones more than they check their customers, and have twenty minutes to kill while Joe goes downstairs and tries to find your game on the satellite (which is a euphemism for competing in the Olympics in the javelin) and then comes up stairs (yes) with a bogus excuse about the fact your game is not on television even though the ESPN scroll has score updates and stats from the game.

So in conclusion, Thursday, Summers, Real Football (not futbol).

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