Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Slummers Guest Post: Quoth the Raven "Never Again"

Every once in a while someone says it better than we do. As much as we on the Slumlog editorial board like to feature original content because we like to hear ourselves talk, we can't take credit for the following diatribe. This rant was forwarded to us by a reader. Enjoy:


I really hate crossing the river and when I do it really pisses me off to go all that way, risking my life crossing the river, to then eat some crappy ass wings.

When I went to Summers with [name withheld to protect the innocent] and [name withheld to protect the guilty] (yes we all know [radio edit] is a vegetarian but she is always willing to go on a wing adventure with me, what a gal!) I was hoping for some great Mardi Gras deals since we went on Fat Tuesday. The deals were not so great but they did have half price wings so I had to do the honors of getting some.

Summers offers two kinds of wings “Spicy Buffalo Wings” and “BBQ.” I made sure to get a basket of half and half so I could try both flavors. If I only knew what I was in for I would have just stuck to the drinks and had NO wings, and that is rare for me to say I wouldn’t eat ANY wings.

1. Spicy Buffalo Wing- these wings were one of the soggiest wings I have ever eaten. They tasted as if they had been cooked and soaked in some weird liquid to soften the skin to make them extra soggy and then covered in a nasty Buffalo Sauce that made me want to gag. The sauce was slightly spicy and would be on a medium hot scale. I would say these were spicy only if my lips were chapped.


2. BBQ-These wings were crunchy and not sopping soggy like the Buffalo ones but they were not a good crunch. They were crunchy as in they seemed to have been cooked first and placed under a heating lamp to stay hot, which then caused the stupid wings to get crusty and dry out. So yes I guess a better term would be these were crusty wings not crunchy and the BBQ sauce did nothing to try and help them. They were awful.


Needless to say I would not eat at Summers again. Their wings were horrible and I didn’t find their food choices to be that appetizing or for them to have something on their menu that stood out from other “bar” food to encourage someone to come in and order food and drink their beer. They do nothing to try and stand out instead they seem to be okay with being the neighborhood hole in the wall.


  1. WINGS of Washington

  2. Old man how you tarry, old man how you weep
    The blue cheese you carry and the wetnaps you keep
    For the crisp skin of roosters and the plump flesh of hens
    Come never, O never, O never again

  3. Obviously this horrible review is not real. Everyone knows Summers wings don't come in basket. They come on plate with piece of lettuce from next door trash can.

  4. Dear Wing Master:

    I saw it on the World Wide Web so it must be true. Besides, the rant is not presented as a statement of fact, it is one person's opinion so does it even matter if it is true?