Monday, June 7, 2010

Imagination is a powerful deceiver

Congratulations to Summers Restaurant for being one of only three Arlington venues to be featured in today's World Cup 2010 DC-area viewing guide.  Further congratulations to whoever made the decision not to include a photograph of Summers Restaurant, which would have had to compete with the photographs of all the other normal-looking places to watch the games.


  1. Is metromix anything like trail mix? I hate dried fruit. Eating dried fruit reminds me of the time I made out with my friend's grandmother and nibbling the nape of her neck was like getting a mouthful of wrinkled raisins and dried apricot.

  2. Hey buddy, I thought we had a deal! You got to make out with my grandma and I got to make out with yours, and we promised to never mention it again. I was only doing it because I felt bad that you'd never made out with a girl before. That, and I thought your Gram was kinda hot. Maybe you don't remember your vow of secrecy because you had to drink a whole bottle of NyQuil just to get up the nerve. But I remember that night. Quite fondly, in fact. Ahh, Granny Ess-Dog... what a sweetheart she was. And foxy, too! Rrrowl! How's she doing, anyway? No, y'know what? Nevermind. You thought you could distract me with Granny fantasies. Screw you, Ess-Dog! Now everyone's gonna think my Grandmother's a dirty tramp! You should be thanking me! You'll pay for this, man. You'll be commentating your own funeral when JC Chasez Bobblehead is through with you!

  3. Just as long as JC Chasez Bobblehead doesn't sing at my funeral, we're all good. He was the least talented member of the Backstreet Boys anyway.

  4. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
    Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

    Get loose everybody 'cause we're gonna do our thing. 'Cause you know it ain't over 'till the fat JC Chasez bobblehead sings. Hangin' tough, hangin' tough, hangin' tough. Are you tough enough?

    Oh my bad, wrong shitty boy band. I'm so sorry. The answer is still no. You're not tough enough, you're not even tough. Come over here and I will kick your bitchy little ass punk.