Because you suck, but you suck don't suck that much.
1. Oregon Ducks - Seriously. Play a real team and then I'll think about putting you in the BCS.
2. Bobbleheads - Worse than Canadians. And SO patronizing. Always nodding their heads like they totally agree with you then saying or doing nothing when you ask for their support.
3. Wizards Bandwagon fans - The number one pick in the draft means jack sh!t. How soon we forget Kwame Brown. I'm a native Washingtonian but your overwhelming optimism in how totally awesome our sports teams are is unsettling. Wake up and smell the coffee.
4. Decaf Coffee - WTF?
5. Trivia Nights - Seriously. I know nothing. Stop treating me like a Mensa candidate.
6. Professional Wresting - It is total bullshit.
7. Red Room - Its still half green.
8. UEFA Champions League Soccer - Great. Big Fish in a little pond. Who cares about soccer?
9. Futbol - It spelled "football".
10. Mya - She'll bring me beer. Eventually. This year some time. I think.